We’ve started a new video series with I Am a Mom & Pop where we focus more on the “heart” of stories. We originally started BB to get stories from entrepreneurs on how they started and what they’ve learned but now we are sharing the true struggles of what it’s like running a business and how it can affect your everyday life too. There are so many small and family businesses that have so much knowledge to share and we wanted to share our stories first to kick off the new series.
I have had so many emails this past year where people have asked where we’ve been, what direction we’re headed with BB, Mom & Pop etc. I haven’t fully gone into detail with everyone I’ve spoken with only because I wasn’t even fully sure what was next for us with everything. For the first time we know what we need to do and where to go from here so the best way we can do that is to first share our story.
I’m excited for this new chapter of where we are sharing small business stories of struggle, triumph, heartache, tragedy, success and faith from people across the country. What we’ve been through this past year changed our perspective in life and business. Some might say we’ve changed but we haven’t changed, we just see things a little clearer than we use to.
New stories are coming to iamamomandpop.com in Jaunuary 2014. Send your stories to iamamomandpop(at)gmail.com
Learn more about our mission with Rachel’s Ring too.
This week I turn 30.
Sorry, still getting use to saying that. I am finally done with my 20’s and movin on up. Some might say “30 is a big change and I hated getting out of my 20’s.” Well, honestly it doesn’t feel any different to me at all and I would rather be going forward than backwards any day. Can you imagine being in high school these days? No thanks.
It doesn’t bother me with turning the big 30 because that’s not what I struggle with. What I’ve been struggling with is that when I started all of this business with BB, production work etc. I had this idea that by the time I was 30 I would have something awesome happen or have something to show for the hard work that I put into what I do. Although I’m blessed with what I’ve done and the point I’ve made it to, my mind can’t help but realize that I had no clue that I would have to bury my middle sister in late July last year. I had a feeling that something big would happen like I said but not dealing with the death of my sister at her age of 25.
When something like this happens you try and figure out “why” or “if there something you could have done” but I can tell you there is nothing that you can do and you only make yourself sick worrying about it. At some point you have to let it go. I like to think that I balanced everything I did with work and life. I enjoy what I do and the people I meet so that was never causing me less joy in my life at all. But there is that competitive spirit in me that pushes forward of course. I used to talk with my sister Rachel about it all the time, even 3 weeks before she passed away. I was talking to her about work and she would say to me, “Just stop, breathe and look around you.” She always had a way of putting things and making me forget about work and to remember what’s important in life. She lived life to the fullest and to this day, I still feel she had an intuition about what was to come.
Like I mentioned in my last post, my life came to a halt and finding inspiration to work on what I once was doing didn’t even matter to me. I had to learn to smile again before I could even wrap my mind around what I needed to get done on a daily basis. I truly think part of this was to wake my family and I up with many things. When running family businesses, you’re worn out but the business depends on you at the end of the day too. I’ve changed some things up and stopped trying to stay ahead because it’s just exhausting especially with the way the internet and social media are with everyone trying to be the front runner.
Some might tell you that 30 is young (and yes I completely agree with that) but I also think that you can learn a lot in 30 years, if you’re paying attention too that is. Some say I’m an old soul and I would have to agree on that but it also allows me to pay attention to details that others tend to miss. I figured with the 30th birthday this week I would share some things that I’ve learned over the years. Hopefully you can relate or learn something new…
- Kids have it figured out. Listen to them more, they might just teach you something.
- Never judge someone before you learn their story.
- Don’t fight dirty, fight smart.
- Commonsense always wins over brains.
- Don’t allow people to get close to you too quickly, because most are going to break your heart or upset you at some point.
- A friend loves at all times. Real friendships never include jealousy.
- Religion is now just a word. The bible is the truth.
- If you’re an honest person, you will do well in business. People like honesty when doing business.
- No matter how good of a liar you are, things will eventually come out at some point.
- Don’t always assume people have your back.
- Success does not define you.
- A person’s group of friends can say a lot about them.
- Don’t surround yourself with negativity. It will eventually bring you down as well.
- Don’t ever get comfortable enough with your surrounding that you forget who you are and what you love.
- Don’t expect others to be there for you if you can’t be there for them too.
- A nice sunset can always remind you that life is good and that you lived another amazing day.
- If you don’t believe in God then go to the top of a mountain and look out. I promise it will change your mind.
- Money doesn’t mean a thing.
- A hearse doesn’t carry a luggage rack.
- If you can truly admit that you miss someone, then they are worth keeping in your life.
- No matter where you live there are always pros and cons.
- Listen more.
- If someone needs to talk, stop what you’re doing and focus on them.
- If something happens in your friends life, don’t wait for them to reach out to you. Go sit beside them until they are ready to talk.
- Some women never grow out of the high school gossip phase. You’ve been warned…
I literally could go on and on…but as my grandmother would say, “that will do for now.”
To anyone else turning the big 30 this week, cheers!
I know, I know…I haven’t updated this in a while. For one, I’ve been busy and two, I’ve lacked inspiration…
About 8 months ago I was struggling with being uninspired and honestly I was exhausted. It seems like everywhere you turn, you have to update this, instagram that, tweet somebody before you miss that small window etc. I was becoming burn out and felt like at one point that was all I was doing ALL day.
Struggling with this was one thing but then an unexpected curve ball took the wind out of my sails about 6 1/2 months ago, my middle sister was killed in an motorcycle accident. That was enough to make me want to curl up in a ball and separate myself from everything. Which is what I did for a month or two. In that moment, you don’t feel like anything matters and stumble wondering why we actually do what we do each day. Is it to have the things we have? Be on top? Finally have that dream house we’ve always wanted? None of that really ever mattered to me but it really didn’t matter after having to swallow losing my sister.
That in itself is a whole other story that I will share very soon, so stay tuned…
At some point in business you’re always going to have a burn out moment, it’s just inevitable. Anyone who disagrees with that is just lying to themselves otherwise. When we originally started Business Beware it was to help fellow business owners and share stories with others to inspire those wanting to start a business of their own. The show has been a great way for us to share the stories across the boards and we even have a ton of people contact us to share their story with us. For a show, that’s exactly what you want but the problem is that so many of these people were only wanting to share something to say, “What’s in it for me?” I actually recall one person I contacted about doing an interview with (who originally reached out to us) asked about all the outlets we were in, where it was aired, how many viewers etc. That was fine but I told them they were missing the point of what our show was all about – sharing stories to educate and inspire others, not about getting something in return for sharing your story. As a side note, they were also a startup business who thought they deserved the royal red carpet rolled out for them. I told them they were in for a rude awakening if they thought that everything just goes according to plan and people come busting down your door to talk to you.
Now granted, I had just lost my sister and I was in a fog as it was but I was blown away by how selfish some people were. I’m on the phone thinking, “To be honest with you, I don’t care because there are more important things in life than being worried about how many twitter followers you have. Oh by the way, my sister just died…” It’s not like I could just bust out and say that but there were many times I wanted to just to make someone take a step back for a moment.
I remember talking to a friend one day and they asked how everything was going and I just replied with, “I’m burned out and at this moment could throw everything out of the window.” They said to me, “Why? Everything you do helps others around you and I even get something from the stories I read on I Am A Mom and Pop AND I’m not even a business owner.”
I don’t know why but for some reason that’s exactly what I needed to hear. We go about our day, doing what we do and sometimes we think to ourselves, “Does anything that I do matter?”
Yes, it does.
I was struggling with trying to balance and keep up with everything that I forgot to focus on the root of what I do. I think many of us lose sight of why we started something because of all the static going on around us from having to keep up with social media, experts telling you this and trying to get ahead of the person next to you. Here’s what I can tell you:
- You don’t need to constantly update your social media accounts like everyone tells you to.
- Don’t settle for something less than what your ultimate mission is just to get ahead.
- It’s okay not to answer an email within 10 minutes of when you received it, it’s not going anywhere.
- It doesn’t matter how many followers you have because anyone can buy them these days (your mouth just dropped didn’t it?).
- Before you assume that someone is ignoring your emails, calls etc. just consider that something else might be going on in their life you have no clue about. – Be cool.
I could honestly sit here and list a lot more but I’ll spare you on that. You might be thinking about walking completely away from what you do and you’re already over it all. That’s okay.
Here’s my thought on that – Isn’t it better to walk away from everything and everyone than ultimately losing who you really are?
That’s my advice on that so take it and figure it out but make sure it makes you ultimately happy. Am I going to walk away from all of what I do? No. But now I’ve refocused myself and know what I need to accomplish and what I need to let go of. Sometimes things in life happen to make you remember what’s truly important. I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. Whether you agree or disagree with me, figure it out and make sure you’re truly happy with whatever it is you do.